Faking it

The Prioritization of Women's Orgasms During Heterosex: A Critical Feminist Review of the Implications for Women's Sexual Liberation

Orgasm is considered by many to be an essential part of women's ideal sexual experiences. As a result, sexual liberation narratives have often advocated for the prioritization of women's orgasms - particularly during heterosex - framing them as a central indicator of "good," healthy, liberated sex. However, scholars have increasingly critiqued these narratives, arguing that they result in an orgasm imperative that has negatively impacted women's sexual lives. Perspectives that promote the prioritization of women's orgasm and those that warn against the negative repercussions strive for the same thing - to draw attention to women's sexuality in ways that will lead to more pleasurable, enjoyable, and equitable sex for women overall. Yet, together, they offer contradictory messages about the role that women's orgasms can or should play in women's sexual liberation. For example, one could argue that it perhaps makes sense to prioritize women's orgasms given that they often are highly pleasurable for women, center a unique form of embodied pleasure, and offer a supposedly clear objective for women and their men partners. On the other hand, such narratives frame women's orgasm absence as abnormal, concede to men's sexuality in problematic ways, and constrain more comprehensive possibilities for women's sexual pleasure. In this critical feminist review, I offer a summative outline of these and other contradictions, focusing on how narratives prioritizing women's orgasms can have simultaneous benefits and negative repercussions when it comes to (1) women's sexual pleasure, (2) the medicalization/pathologization of women's orgasms, and (3) heterosex norms.

Social Perceptions of Masculinity and Sexual Esteem Are Impacted by Viagra Use, Testosterone, and Sexual Performance

Sexual behaviors play a role in the social construction of masculinity. Moreover, this stereotype has been capitalized upon by pharmaceutical companies, as well as those that sell products not approved by the U.S. Food and Drug Administration, for purposes of marketing sexual medicines. Stereotypical notions of masculinity, however, also emphasize the importance of self-reliance, which may cause some to look unfavorably upon the use of sexual medicine. Consistent with this notion, a male target was viewed as more masculine when his female partner consistently reached orgasm, unless he had no history of erectile dysfunction (ED), but was taking Viagra anyway (Experiment 1; N = 522). In addition, when his partner consistently reached orgasm, ratings of his sexual esteem were also lower if he used Viagra than if he did not, but only if he had no history of ED. In Experiment 2 (N = 711), although there was no effect of a male target's use of testosterone, social perception of his masculinity and sexual esteem increased as his "natural" levels of testosterone increased. In addition, exploratory analysis revealed that if the male target had low (but not normal or high) "natural" levels of testosterone, ratings of his masculinity were higher if his female partner consistently had an orgasm, which suggests that female orgasm served to "rescue" masculinity. Because expectations about drugs drive their use, it is important to address preconceived notions about the use of sexual medicines for purposes of enhancing masculinity and sexual esteem, as the social perception of their use is much more complex.

Do Women Withhold Honest Sexual Communication When They Believe Their Partner’s Manhood is Threatened?

We explored whether women who perceive that their partners’ manhood is precarious (i.e., easily threatened) censor their sexual communication to avoid further threatening their partners’ masculinity. We operationalized women’s perceptions of precarious manhood in a variety of ways: In Study 1, women who made more money than their partners were twice as likely as those who did not to fake orgasms. In Study 2, women’s higher perceptions of partners’ precarious manhood indirectly predicted faking orgasms more, lower sexual satisfaction, and lower orgasms rate through greater anxiety and less honest communication. In Study 3, women who imagined a partner whose masculinity was insecure (vs. secure) were less willing to provide honest sexual communication, via anxiety. Together, the studies demonstrate a relationship between women’s perceptions of partner insecurity, anxiety, sexual communication, and sexual satisfaction.

Orgasm Coercion: Overlaps Between Pressuring Someone to Orgasm and Sexual Coercion

Trying to ensure that a partner orgasms during sex is generally seen as positive, but research has yet to assess how this might involve pressuring partners to orgasm in coercive ways. In the present study, we tested whether pressuring a partner to orgasm is a coercive behavior by assessing how this behavior overlaps with sexual coercion (i.e., pressuring someone into having sex). Participants of diverse gender/sex and sexual identities (N = 912, M age = 31.31 years, SD = 9.41) completed an online survey that asked them whether they had ever felt pressured by a partner to orgasm, to describe what partners have said or done to pressure them, and to answer a series of questions about the most recent incident in which this occurred. Mixed quantitative and qualitative results showed that orgasm pressure tactics were analogous to sexual coercion tactics and that being pressured to orgasm was associated with experiencing sexual coercion, faking orgasms, and negative psychological and relationship outcomes. Together, findings challenge the assumption that trying to ensure a partner's orgasm occurrence is necessarily positive and demonstrate that orgasm coercion exists.

Faking Orgasm: Relationship to Orgasmic Problems and Relationship Type in Heterosexual Women

Introduction

Although faking orgasm among women appears quite common, the roles of orgasmic problems and relationship type in partnered sex and masturbation have not been fully explored.

Aim

We assessed the relationship between orgasmic problems (separately in partnered sex and masturbation) and faking orgasm across various types of relationships while also considering the role of demographic and sexual function related covariates.

Methods

In this study of 1,168 Hungarian women, we assessed orgasmic problems, sexual functioning, and the prevalence and frequency of faking orgasm in 3 relationship types: romantic relationships, one-night stands, and continuing sexual relationships of more than one night.

Main Outcome Measure

Differences in faking orgasm across 3 types of relationships; the association between faking orgasm in 1 type of relationship with faking orgasm in other types of relationships; and the relationship of “orgasmic problems” in partnered sex and masturbation to the presence and frequency of faking orgasm in various relationship types.

Results

A subset of women who faked orgasm in 1 relationship type were more likely to fake orgasm in other relationship types. Orgasmic problems predicted the occurrence and frequency of faking orgasm in all 3 relationship types, though to different degrees. Other factors, including orgasmic difficulty during masturbation, the frequencies of masturbation and partnered sex, and the self-rated importance of sex were also related to the frequency of faking orgasm.

Conclusion

Our findings suggest that faking orgasm has both dispositional and situational elements. “Orgasmic problems” in partnered sex was a consistent and robust predictor of the occurrence and frequency of faking orgasm in different relationship types.

Hevesi K, Horvath Z, Sal D, et al. Faking Orgasm: Relationship to Orgasmic Problems and Relationship Type in Heterosexual Women. Sex Med 2021;9:100419.

The Development and Validation of the Orgasm Beliefs Inventory

While orgasm is often conceptualized as a physiological reflex, research has also shown it to be symbolic and to be attributed significant meaning. However, in the absence of a comprehensive measure assessing cultural orgasm scripts and beliefs, the extent to which individuals personally endorse them is unknown. Grounded in sexual script theory, the present research aimed to develop and validate a measure assessing cultural orgasm beliefs, and to investigate gender differences in their endorsement using the new measure. In Study 1, an MTurk sample (N = 448) completed a preliminary version of the Orgasm Beliefs Inventory (OBI). Exploratory factor analyses revealed 11 orgasm beliefs that could be grouped into seven broad categories (Men's Orgasms are Easy/Women's Orgasms are Difficult, Partner Interest Fosters Orgasm, Orgasm is Essential to Men's Sexual Satisfaction, Orgasm as a Relational Quality Benchmark, Orgasm is Unessential to Women's Sexual Satisfaction, Simultaneous Orgasm is Ideal, and Orgasm Requires and Fosters Connection). In Study 2, the OBI was completed by 392 participants. Confirmatory factor analysis was conducted and supported a slightly different 7-factor model. The Sexual Dysfunctional Beliefs Questionnaire, Sexual Scripts Scale, and Types of Jealousy Scales were also completed concurrently with the OBI and yielded results in support of the OBI's convergent and discriminant validity. Compared to women, men scored lower on Men's Orgasms are Easy/Women's Orgasms are Difficult, but higher on Orgasm Absence Reflects Relationship Problems. No other gender differences were found on OBI subscale scores. The OBI is a new measure that can be used in future sexual scripts research to explore the relationships between orgasm beliefs and other sexual outcomes and behaviors (e.g., faking orgasm, sexual communication and assertiveness, sexual function and satisfaction, etc.).

When Orgasms Do Not Equal Pleasure: Accounts of "Bad" Orgasm Experiences During Consensual Sexual Encounters

Orgasms during consensual sex are often assumed to be wholly positive experiences. This assumption overshadows the possibility that orgasm experiences during consensual sex could be "bad" (i.e., negative and/or non-positive). In the present study, we employed an online survey to explore the possibility that orgasm experiences could be "bad" during consensual sex by asking participants of diverse gender and sexual identities (N = 726, M age = 28.42 years, SD = 7.85) about a subset of potential bad orgasm experiences. Specifically, we asked participants whether they have ever had an orgasm during coerced sex, compliant sex, and/or when they felt pressured to have an orgasm (i.e., orgasm pressure). We also asked participants who had such an experience to describe it, resulting in qualitative descriptions from 289 participants. Using mixed quantitative and qualitative analyses, we found compelling evidence that orgasm experiences can be "bad" during consensual sex. Specifically, many participants described their experiences in negative and/or non-positive ways despite orgasm occurrence, reported that their orgasms were less pleasurable compared to other experiences, and suggested that their orgasm experiences had negative impacts on their relationships, sexuality, and/or psychological health. Participants also suggested that social location shaped their bad orgasm experiences, citing gender and sexual identity, gender identity conflict, race/ethnicity, and religion as important to their perceptions of and responses to their experiences. Results directly challenge the assumption that orgasms during consensual sex are always and/or unilaterally positive experiences.

Do Women's Orgasms Function as a Masculinity Achievement for Men?

Orgasms have been promoted as symbols of sexual fulfillment for women, and have perhaps become the symbol of a woman's healthy sex life. However, some research has suggested that this focus on women's orgasms, though ostensibly for women, may actually serve men; but the mechanisms of this are unclear. In the present experiment, we hypothesized that women's orgasms specifically function as a masculinity achievement for men. To test this, we randomly assigned 810 men (M age = 25.44, SD = 8.31) to read a vignette where they imagined that an attractive woman either did or did not orgasm during a sexual encounter with them. Participants then rated their sexual esteem and the extent to which they would feel masculine after experiencing the given situation. Our results showed that men felt more masculine and reported higher sexual esteem when they imagined that a woman orgasmed during sexual encounters with them, and that this effect was exacerbated for men with high masculine gender role stress. These results suggest that women's orgasms do function-at least in part-as a masculinity achievement for men.

“I’m Not Gonna Fake It”

Women faking orgasm has been identified as a common and widespread practice, particularly in the context of heterosexual sex. While feigning pleasure has been the subject of extensive scholarly inquiry, almost no research attention has been applied to women’s experiences of resisting this normative practice. We adopted a discourse analytic approach to explore the question: If faking orgasm is often compulsory, how do women resist this practice and what does it mean when they do? Participants were 15 undergraduate students who ranged in age from 19 to 28. We identified the mobilization of several discursive patterns in their accounts. First, participants mobilized a “future pleasures” discourse to highlight the importance of resisting faking orgasm in order to increase their chances of experiencing genuine pleasure. Second, they positioned sexual satisfaction as an “equal right” to which they were entitled. In some instances, this was discussed in terms of reciprocity, in which pleasure is given and received. In others, it was positioned as a feminist issue of gender and power. Third, participants highlighted the importance of deflecting blame for absent orgasm in order to avoid hurting one’s partner. Fourth, participants described the role of pain as either a factor that prevented them from faking pleasure or that motivated them to fake orgasm in order to end painful sex. We conclude that an equal rights discourse, framed as a feminist issue, holds the most promise as a means of discursive resistance. At the same time, we highlight the significant risks for women of both faking orgasm and not faking orgasm and the delicate discursive work required when an expected orgasm is not experienced. We suggest that efforts to support women’s sexual health and equality are enhanced by better understanding the emancipatory potential of various discursive constructions as well as their limitations and risks. The merits and challenges of each pattern of accounting are discussed in the context of broader scholarship in the area of discursive resistance.

Unpacking the "Pleasures" and "Pains" of Heterosexual Casual Sex: Beyond Singular Understandings

Discussions of heterosexual casual sex are often imbued with (gendered) assumptions regarding the motives for, and drawbacks of, such a practice. The pulls of casual sex are often depicted as sexual gratification and the drawbacks relayed in terms of physical risk, for example, sexually transmitted infections (STIs)/human immunodeficiency virus (HIV) transmission. Most of the research in this area has largely focused on undergraduate university students or "emerging adults" in North America, using primarily quantitative methodologies. We build on this work and a small but growing amount of qualitative research to unpack the complex psychoemotional and experiential dimensions of casual sex. We report on a critical thematic analysis of interviews with 30 ethnically diverse women and men (aged 18 to 46) in New Zealand about their experiences of heterosexual casual sex to achieve two things. First, we demonstrate the complexity with which women and men discussed their casual sex experiences, highlighting how the practice was varied, contradictory, and multifaceted, and played in a localized way during the conversation. Second, we illustrate how this talk was governed by contemporary Western discourses of intimate relationships and the shape of (gendered) heterosexuality. We conclude that casual sex research must always consider the broader sociocultural context, as well as the interpersonal context, within which any sexual relating is situated.

"Did you come?" A qualitative exploration of gender differences in beliefs, experiences, and concerns regarding female orgasm occurrence during heterosexual sexual interactions

This study explored gender differences in young adult heterosexual men's and women's experiences, beliefs, and concerns regarding the occurrence or nonoccurrence of orgasm during sexual interactions, with emphasis on the absence of female orgasm during intercourse. Qualitative reports were obtained from five female focus groups (N = 24, M age = 19.08) and five male focus groups (N = 21, M age = 19.29), involving three to five participants per group. Transcripts of the discussions were analyzed for emerging themes across focus group discussions. Results indicated that, for both male and female participants, the most common concern regarding lack of female orgasm in a partnered context focused on the negative impact this might have on the male partner's ego. Male and female participants also agreed that men have the physical responsibility to stimulate their female partner to orgasm, while women have the psychological responsibility of being mentally prepared to experience the orgasm. Men and women tended to maintain different beliefs, however, regarding clitoral stimulation during intercourse, as well as the importance of female orgasm for a woman's sexual satisfaction in a partnered context. Findings suggest foci for sexual education.