On Creating Deeper Relationship Bonds: Felt Understanding Enhances Relationship Identification

Relational experiences play a critical role in shaping how individuals see themselves. In four studies (N=945) using person-perception, longitudinal, and experimental designs, we demonstrate that feeling understood changes individuals' self-concept by increasing the centrality of a specific relationship (relationship identification). Study 1 showed that participants perceived an individual to be more identified with their relationship when their partner was high (vs. low) in understanding. Study 2 extended these results by examining individuals in romantic relationships longitudinally. The results of Studies 1 and 2 were distinct for understanding compared to acceptance and caring. Studies 3 and 4 manipulated felt understanding. Recalling many versus few understanding instances (Study 3) and imagining a close other being low versus high in understanding (Study 4) led individuals to feel less understood, which reduced identification in their friendships and romantic relationships. Furthermore, Study 4 suggests that coherence may be one mechanism through which felt understanding increases relationship identification.

Political opposites do not attract: The effects of ideological dissimilarity on impression formation

Past research shows that people like others who are similar to themselves, and that political partisans tend to dislike those with opposing viewpoints. Two studies examined how initial person impressions changed after discovering that the target held similar or dissimilar political beliefs. Using potential mates as targets, we found that participants liked targets less, were less romantically interested in targets, and rated targets as less attractive after discovering political dissimilarity with them. Further, they became more uncomfortable with targets after discovering ideological dissimilarity. Theoretical implications and suggestions for future research are discussed.

Epistemic companions: shared reality development in close relationships

We propose a framework outlining the development of shared reality in close relationships. In this framework, we attempt to integrate disparate close relationship phenomena under the conceptual umbrella of shared reality. We argue that jointly satisfying epistemic needs-making sense of the world together-plays an important but under-appreciated role in establishing and maintaining close relationships. Specifically, we propose that dyads progress through four cumulative phases in which new forms of shared reality emerge. Relationships are often initiated when people discover Shared Feelings, which then facilitate the co-construction of dyad-specific Shared Practices. Partners then form an interdependent web of Shared Coordination and ultimately develop a Shared Identity. Each emergent form of shared reality continues to evolve throughout subsequent phases, and, if neglected, can engender relationship dissolution.