"How did you stay together so long?" Relationship longevity, a cross-generational qualitative study

This global qualitative study adopted a cross-generational approach considering key factors contributing to relationship longevity. Relatively few studies consider factors leading to relationship longevity as articulated by couples themselves, and there is a paucity of research considering young couples' questions regarding relationship longevity. This study has two sample groups. In sample one (n = 137) we asked individuals in relationship of 3-15 years questions they would ask couples in marriages of 40+ years. We then asked our second sample of coupled individuals married 40+ years (n = 180) these questions. The primary question from the younger couples to couples in long-term marriages regarded their "secret" to relationship longevity. This study focuses on this one question and coupled individuals' self-articulation of their "secrets" to relationship longevity. The top seven were (1) commitment, (2) altruism, (3) shared values, (4) good communication, (5) compromise: give and take, (6) love, and (7) never give up. The clinical implications for couple therapists are discussed.

Contribution of marital conflict to marital quality in short and long-term marriages: An actor-partner interdependence model

AIMS

In the field of family research, previous studies have made great strides toward understanding the relationship between marital conflict and quality. However, they have only studied couples in short-term marriages. Therefore, much remains to be unraveled with regard to long-term marriages. We aimed investigate the comparative contribution of aspects of marital conflict to marital quality in short-and long-term marriages in Iranian families.

MATERIALS AND METHODS

Using random clustered sampling, 400 dyads in intact first marriages were surveyed across eight provinces of Iran. Complete surveys for both husbands and wives were returned for 162 households (couple's response rate: 40.5%). Survey measures included demographics questionnaire, Barati and Sanai's Marital Conflict Questionnaire and Blum and Mehrabian's Comprehensive Marital Satisfaction Scale. Structural equation modeling was used to test the actor-partner interdependence model of marital conflict-marital quality.

RESULTS

Generalized additive models were incorporated to define what constitutes short-and long-term marriages. Based on the models regressed, duration ≤ 10 years was defined as short-term, whereas duration ≥ 25 years was labeled long-term. In short-term marriages (n = 44), decreased sexual relations, increased daily hassles and sidedness in relations with parents were negatively associated with marital quality in both actor and actor-to-partner paths. In long-term married couples (n = 46), only increased daily hassles (P < 0.001) and disagreement over financial affairs (P = 0.005) contributed to actor paths and only sidedness in relationships with parents showed significant negative association to marital quality in actor-to-partner paths.

CONCLUSIONS

Different themes of conflict contribute to the diminished level of marital quality in early and late stages of the marriage. Conflicts over sex, relationship with extended family and daily hassles are emphasized in the early years of marriage, while in later years; dispute over money and daily hassles dominate.